A mental illness with more serious consequences than depression is attacking

By 立正妈妈 from 蓝橡树

Translated by Max

The top scholar at Peking University survived a suicide attempt. People were shocked and couldn’t believe it. After all, he had impressive academic achievements and a promising future. But nobody could see the turmoil within him.

He felt like he was on a fragmented island, not knowing what he was doing, what he wanted to achieve, and experienced bouts of fear. For 19 years, he had never truly lived for himself.

People mocked him, saying he was a winner in life. Why was he afraid? But he told the psychologist, “Just because I excel in studies and work well, it doesn’t make me happy. I don’t know why I should keep on living. I’m always unsatisfied with myself and constantly feel the need to do better in every aspect of life, but it seems like there’s no end to it.”

He wasn’t alone; he represented countless students. Despite material comfort, parental love, a worry-free academic life, and no apparent traumas in their upbringing, they felt emptiness and lacked the meaning and motivation to live.

Once they awakened to ask, “What? Why? What am I striving for?” Every small issue became a “burden of unbearable lightness of being,” more serious than depression, a “four-nothing” psychology is destroying a generation of young people.

The term “Hollow Man” became popular recently, taken from T.S. Eliot’s poem “The Hollow Men.” It symbolizes modern people not knowing what they want to do, losing their sense of value and meaning. Many seemingly normal individuals feel empty and anxious, lacking confidence and hope in life.

In 2021, research institutions like Tsinghua University School of Social Sciences, Institute of Psychology of the Chinese Academy of Sciences, Beijing Normal University Institute of Psychological Health and Education, Southern Medical University conducted surveys in various provinces with over 300,000 primary and middle school students. They discovered a shocking “four-nothing” phenomenon:

1. No motivation for learning, increased aversion to studying – Many students with excellent grades don’t study because they love it; they do it to meet their parents’ and society’s expectations. When they can’t find the meaning in studying, they develop rebellious and negative feelings.
2. No interest in the real world, addicted to games and social media – Excessive screen time has led to various extreme events, creating tensions in many parent-child relationships. Addicted to games and online interactions, young people escape the pressures of academics but lose connections to the real world, affecting their personal development.
3. Lack of social skills, forming emotional bonds with AI – “AI-powered social interaction” is becoming more popular among young people. They prefer making online friends, idolizing virtual characters, and obsessing over collectible figures instead of engaging with people in real life. Their self-imposed social isolation leads to loneliness and low aspirations.
4. No sense of the value of life, experiencing emotional exhaustion early – Material needs are met, but there’s an emotional deficit. Children lose the natural joy that comes from simple things like seeing a blue sky or flowers. They become indifferent and uninterested, losing the innocence of their age, replaced by apathy and boredom.

Child psychologist Chen Mo wrote, “Today’s urban children have a weak sense of reality. Everything in life has been replaced, and they only know how to study well.” As this “four-nothing” storm sweeps through, the psychological state of young people with “four-nothing” symptoms has become a more severe crisis than depression.

A perfect life, shadows everywhere. Peking University psychology professor Xu Kaiwen mentioned a study showing that 30.4% of Peking University freshmen, including undergraduate and graduate students, dislike studying or find it meaningless. 40.4% believe life has no meaning, living merely according to others’ logic, and some even give up on themselves. These youth with barren hearts live like zombies in the bright sunlight.

In the movie “Sunshine on Me,” Ah Hao, an excellent student, appears perfect but harbors a “four-nothing” psyche. He had one flaw in his life – jumping from a great height.

No one understood why the almost perfect Ah Hao would make such a shocking choice. But there’s a scene in the movie that provides the answer. In one moment, he’s sitting alone in an empty classroom, and in the next, he’s surrounded by people, feeling lonely and fearful.

In contrast, his troublesome younger brother Ah Wen, prone to anger and troublemaking for the ones he loves, lives life with purpose. Ah Hao, despite being the pride of his teachers, is just a tool for his parents’ expectations. He never had any space for himself.

Space, in the form of time and self-exploration, is essential for children to regain their love for life, passion, and a sense of self. The utilitarian test-oriented education kills personal aspirations, causing emotional and value distortions.

A lack of real-life experiences and emotional connections leads to the “hollow” condition in children. They are perpetually busy with no time for self-discovery, exploration, or understanding the true meaning of life.

Our children should have time to play freely, enjoy the simple moments, observe nature, and connect with other living beings. The lack of these experiences leaves them with empty hearts.

In the movie “Investiture of the Gods,” after Bihai Yunxia committed suicide, the people met an old woman selling hollow vegetables. Bihai Yunxia asked the old woman what happens to a person without a heart, and the old woman replied, “Just as vegetables can’t survive without a heart, neither can a person.” Bihai Yunxia then died. An empty heart cannot take you far. In this era of intense academic competition, raising children who have dreams, vitality, and a sense of purpose is the best form of parenting.

Children need to be seen, to feel valued, and to know they are important, rather than being pushed solely for academic success. In the current situation, where parents focus on achievements, children’s lives are filled to the brim, but their inner worlds remain empty.

1. Anxious parents and inappropriate parenting styles – An international study found that Chinese students spend nearly 60 hours studying per week, close to the highest in the world, but their life satisfaction ranks among the lowest. In today’s intensely competitive environment, anxiety has become synonymous with parents. To secure better educational opportunities, children are pressured to excel academically. This results in obedient compliance during childhood, but when adolescence arrives, they begin questioning the meaning of life, and feelings of confusion and helplessness arise.
2. Utilitarian education – The focus on test scores and the pursuit of academic success promotes a one-dimensional value system that devalues emotions, attitudes, and personal beliefs. As a result, children may become passive or adopt materialistic, hedonistic, or self-centered worldviews, distorting their moral compass.
3. Lack of genuine life experiences and emotional connections – Psychologists find that many children with “empty heart” syndrome haven’t experienced significant trauma or loss but are lacking opportunities for self-exploration. A life packed with scheduled activities leaves them emotionally deprived. In a world where children have little time to connect with nature, discover the joy of living creatures, and reflect on life’s meaning, they often grow up with hollow hearts.

An essential aspect of parenting is giving children space, time, and opportunities to explore their own passions, find meaning in life, and connect with their emotions and the world around.